Big Brother 14- Eviction #6 (Boogie) (and Ashley)

BEST WEEK of Big Brother this season!

 

Bye Bye Boogie, Bye Bye. I cannot say that it was sad to see you go. One might say that his greed to go for the 10k instead of immunity or HoH in the slip & slide challenge led to his demise. However, he knew the others were game players and he wouldn't have much competition. Not to say he didn't get blindsided by the eviction. Or even more blindsided by Ian's taped admission of orchestrating his departure.

 

 

Welcome to the game Ian! The Quack Pack kept referring to him as their "Mole." He was more like the Godfather of the Big Brother house this past week though- everyone was out to protect him. Dan and Britney refused to reveal his name as their source and Boogie is still trying to give him game advice as he is walking out of the house... until Ian tells his Yoda, Get to Stepping, referring to Boogie's departing words on an earlier season, and Chilltown knows he's been had.

Now, in reality, Ian does not possess much power in this game. His "manipulation" to get Boogie out of the house was simply revealing the details of his private conversation to his alliance. Although it made him look even more like a prepubescent teen, Britney's manscaping of the lovable geek obviously gave a lil' boost to his testosterone. And in true bildungsroman fashion, the young lad comes of age, wins his first competition and HoH (abbeviated though the reign will be).

 

He even brings an end to the fairy tale showmance that was shredded to pieces the week before on the HoH suite couch. Despite his aggressive grooming habits, Ashley said her date with Ian was "bubble gum" while her time with Frank was "risque." Even admitting the influences of CBS producers, I do have to admit their second date was rather lame. So lame, that it smoothed her path out the door... That is after losing the Veto competition when she unknowingly forfeited the competition to Frank. It seems that in a normal competition, Julie Chen would have pointed out that with only two players left, forfeiting your turn would mean you lose. However, I think even the producers at this point were like- Just get her out!

 

 

By the way, Ashley, who has a degree in elementary education,  apparently thought she would sound less dumb to say that she is a Mobile Spray Tanner than an aspiring model. AND, on her audition interview tape, she said that she wanted to start the "Snow White" alliance and the players would follow her around like the seven dwarfs. That didn't work so well, did it, precious?

 

Also precious? Shane. Who misses his doggie that he sleeps with every night. So, when a poochie pic is added to his HoH suite, he promises to sleep with it at his bed side every night. Can we just share a collection "Awww"- GAG.

 

 

Hmmm... what about this picture looks awkward to you? And although Shane was a bad puppet (!) for throwing Britney "under the bus" to Frank and the old man, he did at least protect Ian and credit JOE with telling him that the two were trying to backdoor him last week. You know that's going to earn some brownie points with me. This week's adds to Joe's ever-lengthening list of annoying traits? The "stories" from being the person to name "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter" to his family selling the land the White House was built on for a mule and a fifth of whiskey. I missed that lesson in my history book, but perhaps his family could use some lessons on bartering.

 

What else does Shane do? Nominate Rocker Chick!

 

 

When she went to Shane in an effort to keep herself from nominated, I reeaally wish Shane would have said something like, "Who are you again?" She said Dan had to go up if she "had any chance of wining this game." Delusional much? She is WALLPAPER! You can go an entire episode, never see her, and not even realize it. She is being referred to as the "ultimate floater." That is giving her far too much credit. Floating can be a strategy. She is nonessential. She is not even a BLIP in the Big Brother season. It was hard to even find a picture of her to post (although props for the matching leopard ball cap and arm sleeve- ugh.) The only thing better than her trying to be all tough and threatening to Shane, was when she is put on the block and Ian says, "Good Luck Man."

Big Brother 14- Eviction #5 (Wil)

I will just touch on my personal highlights during last week's game play, since so much has developed since then to make theorizing worthless, but didn't want to completely skip a posting and move to the next week's ousting.

CBS opened the week referring to The Silent Six as a "Powerhouse Alliance." I must admit that I agreed. I felt pity for my nerdy lil' loner that he didn't realize that his entire alliance had turned their back on him to join the Dark Side with Boogie and Frank. While I though Ian was clueless to what was happening, it appears instead, that I was the clueless one!

The Pack is alive and quacking!

 

 

Britney immediately questions whether voting Janelle, and not Frank, out of the house was a mistake. She says "Frank wears his hair like that in public which means he has no shame and can't be trusted." Dan doesn't feel safe and thinks Frank is going to backdoor him in the Veto. Shane fears this too. Keeping Frank was a dumb move. Dumb. Dumb. Dumb. He is a Powerhouse Alliance all within himself. He had to be taken out of the game when the opportunity was presented because there is no way of knowing how long it will be until that opportunity surfaces again, but show history at this point says that might be quite a while.

 

 

I was sad to see Wil go. He did indeed have some beautiful hair. Good game strategy? Not so much. Asking Frank and Boogie not to put him on the block? Smart. Refusing to reciprocate that promise for one measly week-even if in word only? Dumb. Dumb. Dumb. He played a good psychological game. Like a Thespian he could make any player believe he swallowed every lie they told, until he told us otherwise in the diary room. Sharing his high school troubles with Danielle had her caring for him like a puppy left outside in the storm. Still, he wrote his own eviction notice when he walked out of Frank's HoH suite not willing to say who he would nominate the following week if given the power.

 

 

Ashley has quickly fallen from my favored player list. The fact that she asked Frank on a "date" (Definitely a BB14 legacy) is smart game play- definitely not something we are used to seeing from her. She came onto the show giggling about how much she liked nerdy guys, but I'm not buying it. I think she feels like she would be a "catch" for any nerdy guy. But as soon as the popular jock asked her if she "wanted to make out on the couch," she forgot all about the resident geek. I don't think it was a big insult to go on the date with Frank- it was smart game play. But her back wasn't looking "out of commission" when she was rolling around on that couch. What lowered her standards even more in my eyes, is that the more attention she is given, the dumber she acts. No, she's not a bright one, as Zingbot says, but you can see her going from being generally ditzy to playing the dumb blond the more attention she is given.

 

 

The return of the annoying Zingbot. And his annoying offspring, which Frank releases from captivity when he unsurprisingly wins Veto power. Joking on Shane's pink shirt (borrowed from his niece) wasn't too zingish and Boogie being an old man, not so much a surprise. But when he announce that Shane would be getting something for Danielle- a restraining order- that was kinda priceless.

 

 

Also annoying? Still annoying? Shouting Joe! Even his wife and kids made fun of him, shouting into the cameras. As Frank says, "Joe is like a drunk girl at prom. You know she's going to make a mess, you just don't want her throwing up on your shoes."

 

Or yelling at your TV.

 



Big Brother 14- Eviction #4 (Janelle)

"Always the Big Brother bridesmaid, never the Big Brother bride."

Finally, the masterminds of the CBS production team gives some spotlight to the budding romance between Ian and Ashley, instead of force-feeding us the lustfest between the two attractive players. It was a total gagfest when CBS slow-mo'ed Shane tackling Danielle with a hug after winning the HOH competition. Danielle said she was "like hey." And, I was like, "he knows you are in power this week, duh!" Ugh...I would rather follow the fairy tale of "The Princess and the Frog" then endure much more gushing from the Southern Belle over her shirtless iron-pumping beefcake.

That Southern Belle was definitely drunk on HOH power this week. Before her Queen's Suite is even ready to ohhh and ahhh over, she proclaims that Janelle is jealous of her and she can "float her jealous @$$ out of here." That, of course, proved to be a wise premonition when the power in the house danced right into Mike Boogie's hands and pushed Janelle out the door.

Poor, poor Janelle. So surprised by the back door that she didn't even think to put on make-up for the Veto ceremony.

Explain this one to me please... Did she think that the camera would not pan over to her at any point if she was not on the block? Or, does she think by prettying up for the "Time-Out Chair," the other house guests are going to be persuaded to not vote to evict her. Oh no, can't vote for Janelle she's so pretty... with her make-up.

Of course, we have already proven that she is not the brilliant player she thinks she is and far too transparent in her meager attempts at game strategy. We see this yet again when she bemoans in the HOH Room how desperate she is to get Frank out of the house and then goes directly down the stairs and to the bathroom to whisper to Frank about the game. This whole scenario reminded me very much of when the mean girl runs for Homecoming Queen and will fake-nice with everyone just long enough to get the vote... which, like, totally works because everyone thinks it's super awesome to be, like,  her friend!

It's understandable that Janelle's questionable allegiance would make her a target in the house. Ultimately though each player in this house needs to allied to just one person and that is himself. That being said, it was plain stupid not to send home Frank when the chance was given. He is like the roach of the Big Brother nuclear fall-out. His neck has not left the guillotine all summer. Yet, he survives. He continues to survive, and win competitions, and control the fate of others in the house. I think it was the wrong move for everyone involved except Frank and Boogie, who wants to be his Puppet Master.

The Frank & Boogie Show is likely to be the only showmance to last through the season. Even Ian felt like the puppy dog left outside during the storm and sought alliance elsewhere. Realizing there is no room for him in this Bromance finally sent him for the PLAY the game and not just experience Big Brother. Although there is no doubt he will be the outcast of "The Secret Six," at least this may buy him a bit longer in the game. The floaters aren't going to see him as a threat and the powers are going to see him as a vote in their pocket.

Britney's rank will be only slightly higher than Fido's in this new power structure. Did she not learn anything the first time she joined a male-dominated alliance that pawned her and then dismissed her? She just signed her name in BB blood with the Brigade II. Her honest commentary will be truly missed when this day comes though, from her sarcasm about the circle of obligatory hugs following each ceremony to her applauding Rocker Chick for wining the vacation, "a well-deserved reward for all her hard work and strategizing in the game."

Should there be any doubt of Frank's power in the BB house, let's consider the trend he has influenced among the menfolk.

The list of annoying traits about Frank is long. On that list would be the 4-inch wide wanna-be gangsta style of wearing his bandanna. As weeks pass though, this ridiculous trend gains new followers in the house... much like The Red Tie becoming a symbol of power during Bush 2's reign.

This anointing of the Secret Six certainly has Boogie more interested in the game, after Julie Chen pointed out his pouting tantrum when forced to join his fate with the houseguests'. The other coaches express such shock at his "honesty" at not being willing to get rid of Frank or trusting Janelle. Well duh, Frank is his ONLY ally and Janelle is his biggest threat!

His fake-virtue of wanting to be "just a coach" quickly dissipated when there was a greater chance of him not being sent straight out the door. He even criticized the HOH for not nominating him. Oh me too, me too Boogs.

Big Brother- Noneviction Week (The Reset)

Finally caught up on all the episodes that aired (and drama that went down) while I was out of town.
Another good week BB, lots of good (yet unsurprising) twists.

This not-a-showmance between Shane and Danielle is getting rather boring. I find it deliciously evil that Shane outright declared that he would have preferred that JoJo stayed in the house... but since she didn't, he'll just hook up with Danielle... but not hook up... but hook up. Obviously, CBS in a desperate attempt to create some showmance this season, keeps peppering them with leading questions and editing the aired clips to make it look like more than it is.

Much more interesting is Rocker Chick hitting on Danielle! Oh come on, you know she was... that patio pow-wow when she told Danielle that she likes to treat her woman like a queen and "make love to her brain." Even though the President of Chick-Fila may bring eternal damnation onto CBS, that could be an interesting twist to the summer's plot. The love battle between Shane and Rocker Chick for Danielle's affection would definitely be more entertaining than the spin-a-bottle kiss that had Danielle acting like an innocent bride on her wedding night.

I have seen my share of odd, lame, exciting, confusing, and disgusting competitions on reality shows, but there really aren't words to describe the coahes' competition thi week. It was a blurry neon blend between a cheesy adult film and an 80's Olivia Newton John video.

Frank definitely has game! From his directing Boogie to give Ian the $3k following this challenge to his super-secret alliance with Shane. That worked well. Of course, we have to pity the neglected son of wrestling legend, Sid Vicious! Oh, what a twist that was! Not. Who cares? What was more sad that Ian blubbering over the $3k? Frank's mom tenderheartedly sharing that Frank just doesn't know how much Pappa Sid is "into the show." As if that makes up for all those missed t-ball games. I bet he is "into" the show... and any potential path it could get him back to the limelight. I am not a Franko-fan and cringe every time he and Boogie do their little Dr. Will-flashback hip checks.

What I am a big fan of though, is the Diva War between Janelle and Will. Janelle is going to declare to Brittany that "when I get sad I just change my emotions," then try to turn on the waterworks as she claims to be so upset that Will thinks she doesn't respect him as a player. And? He read her- like. a. book. "Act One, Take Two."

I was also a big, BIG, fan of the Yelling Chef finally being on the block. We were this close to getting him out of the house. THIS close. Oh, but he made himself so much more adoring this week. First there was the breakfast delivered to Shane, in bed, the morning after he won HOH, delivered with, "Sir Shane: This is my apology and ass kissing for the week." Then, Janelle sends him up to the loft to talk "hearts and butterflies" with this week's powers to be, and what does Soul Patch do? Curse to knee-sock wearing Shane about how much "THIS SUCKS." Oh but out brave brave nearly-evicted lil' soldier redeemed himself in his "last chance" speech, right? He declared that "The President of the United States has the right to Veto while in office," and he implores Shane to "Be like the President." Such powerful words.

Joe is a one-man idiot parade, as Britney's impression so clearly demonstrated.

THIS close, but saved by the twist. Well, one player was saved by the twist. Frank probably would have the numbers stacked against him and left, but still... SO close. Those stacked odds are what made Superstar Shane feel safe enough to stab Frank in the back and put him on the block. But the twist, oh the twist... he better hope Frank doesn't win HOH soon.

Big Brother: Eviction #2

How great was this week?

#1-
Russell Jr. is gone in a wave of more self-imploding drama than I could have even scripted.
And, let's take a moment to reflect on this "fight."

Jason's comment to me during this scene was if he fought like Joe, I would divorce him. I replied that obviously I would have to kick the butt of whomever he was fighting with first! I have to admit, I do wish Willie got in one good punch before he was ousted. That "fight" was more lame than a Baby Daddy Brawl on Maury. Hantz is obviously "bad boy" enough... since he was arrested for intoxicated driving just days after his premature house exit. Besides, that new "I'm so effing cool and not the old man" 3-inch long soul patch Joe is growing only adds to the reasons he is too annoying to continue suffering.

#2-

Ian's mommy obviously orchestrated a plane to fly over and drop his bottle of Ritalin tied to a lil' parachute into the Big Brother compound, because this week he went from the pestering freak back to the adorable geek. In searching for a picture of Ian in his cute lil' bow tie, I came across instead a pic of Ashley getting undressed after their date... in the Have Not Room... with Ian sitting on the "bed" behind her. What's up with that?!

#3-

Bye bye JoJo. Her lack of irritability factor is only due to others in the house being far higher on that scale. For me, evictions this week were a toss up. It didn't change the game for me much regardless of who left. She was a bit too hung up on being the caricature of a New York girl though. The only benefit of keeping her was the potential battle lines that could be drawn with her/Shane vs. others. (Aligning themselves with Willie will be like Herpes. He may be gone, but the effect of having been with him will keep coming back to haunt his weak alliances.) There's no hint of a great house divide yet. That will be inevitable when the alumni (unsurprisingly) join the game.

#4-

The ironic chain of HoH winners! Willie stabs Frank in the back, then Frank gets the next HoH. Frank puts Shane on the block, who saves himself, and then wins HoH. Retribution is the featured entree on the Big Brother menu so far this season. And Boogie suggesting that they backdoor Shane (not put him up for eviction but use him as a replacement nominee)? Even Rocker Chick (who I still despise by the way) knew "Pawns always go home!" Yes, granted, that would have worked given this week's scenario... but not if Shane wasn't on the block and therefore competing for the Veto to save himself. That is such a rookie mistake Boogie... tsk, tsk.

#5-

Showmances! How quickly did the budding affection between Shane and Danielle end when she was put up for eviction against JoJo? He did not even TRY to fake empathy towards her! Yes, he may have proposed an alternate plan to Frank to keep her off the block, but once she was pitted against JoJo, he gave her the cold shoulder. Antarctic Baby! Then, he was the ONLY vote for her! It will be interesting to see in this upcoming week if he will be overcompensatingly nice to her given his safe position.

And of course, we cannot mention the summer camp phenomenon that is Showmances without one more nod to Ian and Ashley!

I would say "my two favorite players" hooking up... but Ashley's attempts to prove what a dingbat she was this week were disappointing. Unfortunately, even though she has proclaimed "flying under the radar" to be her strategy, I don't think it's an act. She was so bad at that "Nacho Menu" memory game that she made Janelle look smart.

Big Brother- Eviction 1

I would have preferred to say Week One, but with the emphasis that the guests have been in the house 13 days (how?) that would be confusing.

Well Ian... dear, dear geeky lil' Ian... you are a bit too much. I will have to resend my previous prediction that he would make it to at least the half-way point, and perhaps further if pawned. Instead now, I am apt to predict that his longevity in the house is solely based on how long there are bigger targets to attack (such as Russell Jr. in the upcoming week, yee-haw, sweet justice ahead for Frank? Yank the knife out of your back and throw it at Willie a la the spinning lady at the circus with an apple on her head?)

One trick to surviving on an a reality show where your peers determine your time of game death is to secure a "role" for yourself. Are you the one everyone confides in? Are you the one that cooks or cleans?  (The benefits of this role become moot when you attempt to cook the house's entire ration of  food such as the "I-must-yell-at the camera-in-the-diary-room-to-prove-my-testosterone-level Joe, who is quickly going to turn this to a game of "Survivor" instead of "Big Brother.") 

Or, you may become the entertainer. I have a feeling that Ian has used self-deprecating behavior often in his life to try and gain the favor of those around him. Ironically as he was kicking himself in the head, literally, this past week, I told Jason that could have been his bully-avoidance technique. Seriously, who is going to hurt a guy that starts beating the crap out of himself? That party trick is only entertaining for a fleeting moment and is going to be rekindled far less often than streaking through the house with the other guy's hats cradling your genitals or camping out on the bathroom couch in hopes of getting a boob peek.

This, of course, being ironic with Frank's ploy to label Russell Jr. as a bully in the house tonight. This was a smart move in the sense of the sheeple mentality of house guests to follow the latest stated opinion and thus come together to label a common enemy. I don't think it was very effective though as a last-minute plea to survive eviction. Do you think any players are undecided or change their mind at that point in the game? The best use of the "Final Plea" is to make a proclamation that will affect the next round of game play. As Frank did. Well played Carrot Top. 

Russell Jr., instead, would have liked to paint Mike Boogie as the common enemy. Now, I could be in support of this for two reasons: Number One, it is creepy to be 41 years old and refer to yourself as "Boogie." Number Two, I am already fed up with his self-promoting t-shirts, as if his egocentricity needed such tangible proof. However, that sheeple mentality of the house guests is most evident in their willingness to follow the advise of their "Coach." There are beginning to be rumblings of the understanding that the Coaches are playing their own game, not the house guests' game, but no one has been willing to act upon that belief yet. Even though I agree with Brittney that they are likely to enter the game later, and thus you do not want to make enemies, all the house guests are too willingly abiding by the alliances that they were thrust into by the spinning beds. (I wonder if CBS sees this playing out and thus instigated the Coaches' swap next week?)

Ashley is my favored player for the win right now, mainly because she reminds me of an endeared Key Clubber. But she does face the danger of being wallpaper and becoming a floater. And Wil (with one l... of course) is my favored player by which to be entertained. Russell Jr. is who I want to go... go, g-o, GO... next. I appreciate the value of a villain to the plot, but I am content just disliking Boogie for now. Please don't let Frank be stupid enough to fall for a deal. I still really dislike Rocker Chick but she if flying to far below the radar to be targeted right now.

Big Brother!

There are a lot of iconic images of summer- beaches, sunglasses, flip-flops. For me though, one important symbol of summer is, Big Brother, and tonight was the season premier (Yay!)

When they were introducing the new house guests, I have to admit though, my biggest thought was how stereo-typed they were: the New Yorker, the Southern Belle, the Rocker Chick, the Flamboyant Guy, the Geek, etc. It’s like I could have written a big chuck of that script having never watched the show tonight. (Note to self: If ever decide to audition for Big Brother, have a gimmick, and be a parody of yourself in portraying it.)

A couple of other things I found funny was the Nurse deciding she should lie and pretend to be a Kindergarten teacher so the other guests wouldn’t think she was too smart. Seriously? Does she think a Kindergarten teacher only has a Kindergarten level of education? I’m not saying there aren’t some brilliant nurses out there in the field, but I am quite certain there are just as many brilliant “Kindergarten teachers.”

Also, CBS chose to bring back four former house guests. I’ve not watched every Season of “Big Brother” but I have seen most. One alumni though, Dan, who was a winner of his season? I have never seen or heard of this guy. Couldn’t they find some bigger BB name to bring back?

The biggest caveat for me enjoying this season though will be putting up with another Hantz. I stopped watching “Survivor” because of Russell. Not because “Oh he’s such a bad villain.” No because “I can’t freaking stand this guy being on my TV screen.” And now his brother is infecting BB. Ugh! I wish the house guests were smarter in trying to bust his attempts to hide his identity- like when picking teams, saying that you choose “Mr. Hantz.” I have a feeling he will be gone just before midway through the season. The sooner, the better. I am all about introducing a little drama, stirring up a little conflict. Watching how the players deal with it and each other is the whole point of the game. I’d just prefer the conflict stamped with the Hantz brand end as quickly in the season as possible.

Usually I’ll pick my favored player during the opening night of the season (and that person traditionally makes it to 3^rd place, ha!). Tonight though it seemed we found out even less about them than normal. So, I would have to say the only player that I felt a shining to was the self-professed geek, Ian. I think his youth and naiveté could work against him though. If he is not suckered into having his ego stroked by the “popular kids,” he could have good longevity in the game.

Opposite to that would be Rocker Chick, I think she is SO stuck on creating that persona of herself that it is going to alienate her from anyone else in the game, but she will just blame it on being an individual and people judging her.

Let the Hunger Games begin :)