Monday, May 25, 2009

Reality is Surreal

Memorial Day Weekend. Saturday morning, I slapped the snooze button a few times before crawling out of bed to meet the K-Kids for a Yard Sale & Car Wash Fundraiser for our Relay for Life Team. There was a good turn-out of kids and we raised almost $600 after deducting expenses. It was a success.

Saturday evening, Jason & I went to Kincaids for dinner and to see "Wicked." It was splendidly excellent. I was so distracted by the people around me- from the obnoxious laughter of the teen girl three seats down trying to fake her undevoted enthrallment to the woman rattling her bag of nuts next to me to the old Japanese guy next to me after I moved that kept using his cell phone to see where we were in the list of songs for the production. Then, the guy that sat in front of me after I moved had just a few hairs gelled up in the front of his head that was unreasonably disturbing to my line of view. I wonder how much I let stuff like this bother and distract me and how much may be related to true anxiety issues. Walking out of the theatre there was a kid that kept slapping his folded program against his palm and I wanted to yell at him.

We had not yet pulled out of the parking garage when I was hit with this feeling of being removed from the experience. It was only 15 or 20 minutes ago that I was sitting in the theatre enjoying the play, but it could just as easily have been 2 or 3 months ago. I remember feeling this way after Convention also. I had just come home and shortly after walking through the door it was as if I hadn't been gone for three days having such a wonderful time. For Convention next year, I told myself that I would not take work and I would clean the house before leaving, so I could enjoy the expereince more and not come home stressed. But that doesn't really apply to Saturday night's situation. I want to live in the moment more. I want to be afftected by life more. I have to figure out how to do this.